New Years.

Not sure what's going on tonight when I get out of work. Colby is getting dropped off here at somepoint and then we are going downtown. But from there I have no clue. Hopefully we hook up with some friends and find a place to hang out.

Not real resolutions or anything. Just to save up money and pay off this car and keep it clean and shit. And have an awesome summer full of friends and the rope swing.

Hope everyone has a safe night.

Pizza Hut.

Why did you take 30.78 from my account yesterday when I paid 10.18? Seriously, what the fuck is with these places taking more then they are supposed to.

Jeep!

I bought a 06 jeep wrangler unlimited today. I love it. It was destiny. I pick it up on Friday and I can't wait. I want it now... It's got the extended cab which means bigger back seat and trunk area. It's all black and all black interior. It really is amazing. I've always wanted a jeep! Actually I'm gonna post a pic.

Pretty much it, minus the stupid lights above the windshield.

sum 41.

Is amazing and one of the few bands still together after so long. They continue to put out amazing cd's one after another. And they play what they want to play. Their sound hasn't changed and that's what I love about them. They are awesome dudes. They used to be a 4 piece, but the 2nd guitarist left the band during the writing of the most recent album which was a success.

Tattoos.

I went to my tattoo shop last night to get my left hand tattoo'd. Tony was working and said he wouldn't tattoo my hand. I was like why not! And he said that it wouldn't look good since i dont have like sleeves or whatev. I was like, I only wanna get these 3 fingers done on the inside though. And then he was like ohhhhh, well then that's different! hehe

fuck this place.

Colby and I rented a room at this place Saturday night. We each gave our cards, and split the room total. and took cash from everyone else. Well the toom was $48.50. my card shoulda only been charged 24. Same with colby. My card got charged $74. Colby was charged $56. WHAT THE FUCK. So we are going in tomorrow to talk to a manager. But like... wtf. Thats ridic.

boston.

was so good today. best buds.

xthemoviex

haha seriously fucking watch this.
its only 5 minutes.
you will apreesh it ben.



(NJFILMCORE.COM) X the movie X from njfilmcore on Vimeo.

Brightwood.

Is an indie/rock/amazing band. They remind me of lydia, dear and the headlights, and some other bands, but they sound so amazing. It's been awhile since I've listened. But I was talkin to a friend just now who reminded me of them. If you get the time, check them out. So good.

Myspace

snaps3.

amazing!

This sleeve is simply that. Amazing.
The colors are just ridiculous, and the art is crazy.

Energy.

Is still so good. It's been a little bit since i've listened, but since I'm seeing them saturday I thought I'd refresh my memory. and fuckkkk. Invasions of the mind is such a good cd. So check them out.

All This Was.

Has finally been shipped to me.
After waiting for 16 days....
the dvd and shirt finally showed up today!

Still here.

And still alive.

finally.

colby comes home today. the wait is over.

i wish i was happier though.

nothing about today has gone right so far.
and plans for later arent even happening.
oh well i guess.

colby.

is on a date right now. I think it's funny.
justtt sayinnnn!

Dreaming.

I have the weirdest dreams. I had one last night with you of all people. Not you or you, but you. It was so weird. And the setting was just me on my lappy sitting on my bed. And when I woke up I was reaching for my lappy. It was so weird. So I went online to see if what my dream had was online... but it wasn't and I kinda felt weird. But it's ok cause it was just a dream!

My arms doing good. My shoulder has just about finished healing. It was pretty much done Monday when i decided I'm gonna go add more to the back of my arm. So now my arms sore again and I have to watch myself and make sure I dont bump walls! haha.... But yea, my arms healing pretty nicely. I'm happy with it.

I can't wait for this weekend! It's going to be the best. Only bad thing is I get out of work at 7am Saturday morning and I have to be back at 3pm to work till 11pm. But colby comes home Saturday around 5pm. And he's gonna meet me at my work then we are going down to Boston to see Magz and people! So excited. I love Boston.

zoolander.

haha i love this!
http://reallygoodlooking.ytmnd.com/

Angry.

fuck this guy nik richie.

1. http://thedirty.com/?p=64033

2. http://thedirty.com/?p=68717

my life my way.

I got tattood again today and added to my arm.
And no. It's not a straight edge tattoo.
Stop asking. Thanks.

wear your heart.

Lately I've been more into this band. I wasn't a fan of them a few years ago for whatever reasons. But over the past year I've listened more and more and they're the next big thing in straight edge hardcore. Once Have Heart and Verse break up in February I think it's safe to say the Effort will be on top. They have 2 records and another coming out with in the next month. I'm posting this one since it's hard to find now. But go support them.



download here

05.

think back to the summer time.
i would cross through these state lines.
you were always on my mind.
it should not be this hard to see.
how to get from point a to b.
without losing sleep.

yep.

you chose the outcome.

he helps me.

i'll be.

miserable at best.

ink.

snaps2.

snaps.

anddddddd. fuck you.

16 days.

Only 16 days till Colby is home. I can't wait.

Rise Against.

I forgot how much I love this band. I just downloaded the whole discography. I wish they had an acoustic disc. I love their acoustic songs so much. They haven't changed their sound over the years either which I love. They play what they want to.

Also, check out this site for full cd's. I love it.
mp3locker.net

Awake.

I feel really awake today. The past few days I've just slept. And it's been nice and not so nice. Yesterday I was dieing. I couldnt even keep my eyes open at work. I planned on going to bed when I got home but ended up staying awake till about 12:30am. And I didn't get up till around 1:30pm. So that was a good sleep.

I'm driving to Katies after work tonight. Then tomorrow we're gonna watch the parade and have Thanksgiving. And I have to work at 11 tomorrow night which stinks. Oh well, it's worth it. I'm excited.

Truth.

Take a look at my life. I'm so very fucking far, from the person I aspire to be.

thedirty.com

Is a website for college kids to post people who suck, sluts, and drunk fools. Well Colby was looking at people who go to his school and hes browsing and he came across the funniest thing. ME. Someone sent in my picture and information about me. I'm dieing. It's so funny. I don't even go to ASU. ahahahahah.

http://www.thedirty.com/?p=64033#

"Photographers"

So many of you girls think you are amazing. But you aren't. Your parents got you an expensive camera. You use it on the automatic setting. You take pictures of your best friend, a tree, your pet, oh and the local bands. I guess that's all it takes to be a photographer these days.

Your pictures suck. You know who you are. Km and I could go through local people around here and more then half of them call themselves photographers. All of the pictures the same. Shitty. Find a new direction in life, because the one you're taking is going to come to a dead end soon.

Snaps.

Thanksgiving.

I wish it was Thursday. I've had a lot to be thankful for this year. 07 was a blaah year. 08 really got me back on track. You got my head straight. I wish it was Thursday morning.

Cool.

I can take a hint.

Another video of Josh

This time being this kid Camden that we know. More to come.

I've learned...

I've learned that you cannot make someone love you. All you can do is be someone who can be loved. The rest is up to them. I've learned that no matter how much I care, some people just don't care back. And it's not the end of the world. I've learned that it takes years to build up trust, and only seconds to destroy it. I've learned that it's not what you have in your life, but who you have in your life that counts. I've learned that you can get by on charm for about fifteen minutes. After that, you'd better know something.

I've learned that you shouldn't compare yourself to the best others can do, but to the best you can do. I've learned that it's not what happens to people, it's what they do about it. I've learned that no matter how thin you slice it, there are always two sides. I've learned that you should always leave loved ones with loving words. It may be the last time you see them. I've learned that you can keep going long after you think you can't.

I've learned that heroes are the people who do what has to be done when it needs to be done regardless of the consequences. I've learned that there are people who love you dearly, but just don't know how to show it. I've learned that sometimes when I'm angry I have the right to be angry, but that doesn't give me the right to be cruel. I've learned that true friendship continues to grow even over the longest distance. Same goes for true love. I've learned that just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to doesn't mean they don't love you with all they have.

I've learned that no matter how good a friend is, they're going to hurt you every once in a while
and you must forgive them for that. I've learned that it isn't always enough to be forgiven by others. Sometimes you have to learn to forgive yourself. I've learned that no matter how bad your heart is broken, the world doesn't stop for your grief. I've learned that our background and circumstances may have influenced who we are, but we are responsible for who we become. I've learned that just because two people argue, it doesn't mean that they don't love each other. And just because they don't argue, it doesn't mean they do.

I've learned that sometimes you have to put the individual ahead of their actions. I've learned that two people can look at the exact same thing and see something totally different. I've learned that no matter the consequences, those who are honest with themselves get farther in life. I've learned that your life can be changed in a matter of hours by people who don't even know you. I've learned that even when you think you have no more to give, when a friend cries out to you, you will find the strength to help.

I've learned that writing, as well as talking, can ease emotional pains. I've learned that the people you care most about in life are taken from you too soon. I've learned that it's hard to determine where to draw the line between being nice and not hurting people's feelings and standing up for what you believe. I've learned to love and be loved.

Grave Maker

For real this bands awesome. Just got off a tour with Comeback Kid, Misery Signals, and Outbreak. Speaking of Outbreak, they played in Dover tonight at the brickhouse with Agnostic Front. It was ridiculous. So many skinheads. But anyways. Listen to this band. Download their cd.

Download it here.

Bird in the cage.

My girl, my girl, tell me why you look so sad...
Has the sun finally set on us?
Have you come to long for another's hand?
There's a feeling inside me that somethings leaving.
Like someone stealing salt from sea.
Left me sinking and left me thinking
how to keep you caged with me

Because I need you like air to breathe
Just to hold you.

dunno.

Time

time wont change for me.

you need to realize it on your own.
im not saying a thing.
i'll just let it eat at me on the inside.

Hanging out with mags part2

merry christmas

Josh hung out with me at work all night. And we decided to make an early Christmas vid/ make fun of colby vid. So enjoy.

New ISHC

The new International Superheroes of Hard Core ep is so good. Nothing but the best from those guys always. Its a 4 song disc titled HPxHC. Harry Potter is Hardcore. haha. The album art is awesome. Has a hardcore looking harry potter with a baseball bat and a bunch of dead wizards behind him.

More.

-picking you up from work
-mad libs in barnes and noble
-seeing people who look like big will
-matching v necks
-sharp toe nails
-cuddling at the beach
-getting ice cream
-your love for snakes
-the look you give me
-mix cd's
-what would you rather
-making fun of random people on myspace

Fight Everyone.

Fight Everyone broke up. So gay. I wish their myspace said why. I can't imagine it being because a member left. They have like 9 members hah. Oh well, still a very solid band. 2004-2008

www.myspace.com/fighteveryone

Blaaaahhh.

I'm so fucking miserable. I been at work since 3pm. And I am so bored. Nothing to do and no one to talk to. Everyone's busy with their own shit or doing whatever. I just want to go home and sleep and forget all about today.

Water Runs Dry

I'm sitting here bored at work. I'm listening to A Loss For Words. Love them. There was only 5 check in's for today. There's now 4 left. I hate slow days. Sometimes I pray for them but most of the time i wish it would just be checking people in so the time goes by fast. Things I hate are when the phone rings and people ask if we're modern or a 4 star hotel or if we're in a good area. I also hate when people are on our website and asking questions when they could just as easily look it up...

I've been looking for another job. I called the Augusta Holiday Inn a couple weeks ago and the GM finally got back to me last week. They aren't currently hiring for front desk but she'll keep me on file close to the front because I'm employed by IHG and I have certain credentials.

I miss Katie. I always miss her most the day I leave and the day after. We just go for so long seeing each other together and then it's cut for like a week to two weeks. I been writing in a book journal lately of all the things I love about her and us. And everything I miss when I'm away from her. I think I'm gonna start doing that here too. A few things every now and then. Today she went to go work out! I think her going to work out is gonna get me to start again. I just wish she'd respond! I love you :p

-photo shoots in the basement
-sneaking kisses on your couch
-the run and jump
-snowy drives and spinning wheels
-parking at night in augusta
-awkward smiles
-late night texting saying i like you
-our first kiss, touch, and smell
-holding you holding me

Awake.

I can't sleep. I'm so tired too. I just can't sleep. It's been a problem now for a few weeks I guess. Although I slept good this weekend. I can't decide if its cause of work and being up all night so sleep all day or it was the comfort of having my girlfriend next to me all night. I'm gonna decide on both being the answer.

Awhile back Ponch and I made a video using a funky camera setting and we posted it. Until today I'd kinda forgot about it. But Colby and I decided to start making other little videos. And we're having so much fun. His roommate Ryan is making one right now. I can't wait to see it. And I dunno about other people but I laugh watching myself and Colby. We've gotten a few comments on the videos saying haha. I just want it to take off and I can be a vh1 host or be on reality tv....


check us out!
viddate on youtube

Me, Colby, Ponch and anyone else

Anyone that wants to join in on this can. Just let us know!

http://www.youtube.com/user/viddate

Polaroid.

We love you Ben!

Tired Eyes.

Woke up Thursday at 8am after having gone to bed at about 3:30am. Was up till Friday morning at 7:30am. Talk about shitty. I'm back at work now. It's 1:53am and I just wanna go back to my place and snuggle Katie.

Today we woke up around 2pm and watched the 25th hour with Ed Norton. We love you ed<3 We then got showered and dressed and went to Pizza Hut ITALIAN BISTRO! Don't know why the fancy name... It was a regular Pizza Hut to us. Then we went to the mall and I got a new flannel from American Eagle. Katie had me try on a bunch of stuff and we finally settled on what we liked. Then we went to Victorias secret! woo! I was gonna buy her stuff but she wouldnt let me. So on Sunday when we are in Boston... here we come lingerie stores! Then we went to Bath and Body Works. I got a bottle of Aromatheraphy Massage Oil. After that we went home and I gave Katie best back rub with the oil. And then we snuggled till I had to come to work.

And here I am. Bored for another 5 hours. But when I get out of work!!! Katie and I are going to this really awesome bakery and getting lots of desserts and treats. Then I'm sleeping all day!

Ben, hang out monday!?

1 No Show.

I'm sitting here at work eating bagel bites and drinking coke. I'd much rather be back home in my bed with my girlfriend. I'ts been about 2 weeks since we saw eachother last and today was kind of short and I miss her. I did not want to leave for work at 10:30pm. I never want to leave when it means you wont be coming with me. I miss you so much and knowing how close you are makes these next 5 hours go by so slow. I just want to curl up into bed with you and give backrubs and kisses all day. I don't even mind that you hog the blankets or the sheets come unattached everytime you sleep in my bed. Just knowing you're there next to me or holding me is so comforting. I need that every night. But every few nights every other week is holding me together. I love you Katie McConnell. Never forget that.

Photo.

This dudes photos are amazing. I am in love with his animal shots. Check him out if you're into photography or animals or just some amazing art.

NickBrandt.com

Barack.

Has won. Big whoop! Maybe more colorful prints of him will be made!

Suggestion.

Lately I been listening to a lot of local hardcore. And a lot of thrash. I gotta say it's been awhile since I have listened to In Remembrance. They are fucking amazing. So I say go listen now. And support them.

Yea Ben, I'm copying you with band suggestions!

In Remembrance myspace

winter beard challenge.

Basically if you accept the winter beard challenge, you agree to no shaving from Nov. 1st- end of Feb. And I intend on taking that challenge. So no shaving for a long time. I hope i look fucking burly in February. I'm sure I will. I will keep you updated on the progress.

Smell the shorts

I had a dream like it was just yesterday. And boy did it make me open my eyes. I will never give up on you. I will never stop loving. I need you so much closer. You are the most amazing thing to ever come into my life, and you won't ever leave it.

Rory called me today and asked if I wanted to hang out. It made me really happy. I haven't hung out in so long. I have definitely missed it. I met him at the mall and then we met up with black josh. We got 5 halloween costumes, a ton of fake blood, mustaches, and some cool lights. We waited for Dalton and Sam to get out of work at 7.

We all got our costumes and headed downtown for some fun. At this point it was like 8:30pm because of the gas station stops and random shit. But downtown was surprisingly dead. But we walked around with our costumes anyways. It was fun. I miss hanging out everyday like we all used to. I even missed seeing Dalton all the time. It was different having black josh with us all instead of Colby. But a good different.

I think tomorrow we are all gonna go to a show in Portsmouth at 6ish. I probably wont be up till around 2-3pm. Then I gotta call ponch cause he's actually gonna go with us. I guess he has been all about his girlfriend lately and refusing to hang out with anyone but her. We are wearing our costumes there in hopes of people not knowing who we are so we don't have to put up with drama and shit. Since the show is being put on by people who dislike us. And then it's off to work for 11pm.

Halloween week

I am at work, so bored! And i don't think I am doing anything on halloween for like the 3rd year in a row. I'd like to see people but everyones busy with parties or shit. And I have to work at 11, which really sucks. Oh well.

Ben hang out with me.

km and me had our 9 month today!